What’s Left of Me?
Too many questions
I’ve been asked several times in the last month – by friends – grounded in “faith,” questions that I have asked of MYSELF and intentionally ignored — for a long time.
I’m not going to mention what those questions were, for several reasons.
First, these friends don’t know their questions hit my “hot” button.
Second, I did not realize they were hot topic questions until the moment they asked me.
Third, the questions they asked are part of my deepening relationship with God.
Likewise, those questions do have answers but I’m not sure I can answer them for the moment…nor for the foreseeable future
Does that sound confusing or mysterious?
Well, good….But they shouldn’t.
I don’t feel like I can answer those questions without taking away God’s sovereignty.
In continuing my First Fruits 30 day challenge today Sarah Young mentions this: “Trust is like a staff you can lean on as you journey uphill with me”
If I don’t trust God’s sovereignty I am taking the weight off that staff and I run the risk of tumbling back down the hill. I’m too weary to take this task on myself and I don’t relish the idea of a tumble.
But the BiGGest reason I don’t want to make myself answer those questions is because:
1) My answers would be less satisfying than his
2) I would rush the process He has designed specifically for me.
3) If I push ahead and take the lead, I’ve lost the advantage of his “macro” view point.
I can’t afford to do that…I’ve got to protect the investment
I am God’s investment – He already made the down payment
THE point is that Jesus knew God’s timing was Supreme.
He understood that.
I need to understand that.
I really need to recognize that my wants
and desires may collide with his
but EVERYthing that happens is for our benefit – To BRING Him Glory.
God will turn the sickest, saddest, most heartbreaking circumstances-
“attacks” against his CHILD-ren…
and make them beautiful….even if we may not see the beauty or witness it first hand.
If we don’t give God the benefit of the doubt, what are we sacrificing?
What gifts are we turning our back on?
Consider the image of Jesus on Good Friday, approaching that cross.
The Nails. The Anguish….and yet, He persevered.
Was He scared? He was a man – wouldn’t we have been scared?
His time had come and he breathed his last breath….except in God’s economy it wasn’t His last breath.
In God’s timing, the BEST was yet to come. The Hurt met the Healer and the world was forever changed.